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Saturday, August 27, 2016

RANT, BE VULNERABLE

 shout at length in a wild, impassioned way-RANT

i woke up today and found FB post with this guy who does short video's called daily RANTS.

i laughed out loud.

Like for instance he had a rant about the chip on credit cards; swipe or insert .i often sit in line at the stores wondering do i swipe or insert? Come on don't you wonder to? Then after waiting so long after you insert there is this loud noise that makes you jump feeling you've been rejected by the cc company. LOL!
As he described that moment of truth I laughed. It reminded me of how good it feels to laugh. i mean really gut laugh. It feels so good! And to laugh about the silly things we do and go through is even better. Having this guy just be honest about things is kind of refreshing. Refreshing because it is honest truth and i feel like ranting about it too!

Sometimes we are trying to be so politically correct in this world that we miss on just being honest acknowledging that things are really out of control. Watching what we're saying holding things deep within where there is hurt and pain. Holding things deep could create depression and bent up fears. We can talk ourselves into incorrect thinking. LIES! The lies within can destroy us. When a leper is suffering you see their wounds and know their hurting and it's not good. But pain inside not spoken outward can create the leprosy inside of us.

The new buzz words i hear "Being vulnerable". i have to be honest i'm a skeptic of being vulnerable. Vulnerability has caused me pain. When i tell someone how i feel and then get shot down and told don't feel that way, you're sensitive.  if there's anyone out there who wants to listen and just say "You're feeling bad, it's okay." Validate my feeling even if you don't agree. Some say well do you want me to let you go on thinking things wrong or seeing it wrong. isn't that the listeners opinion too! See now i'm ranting.

You're probably like "Elaine, where is this going?" i ask God "What should i write about?" i think about my day so far. My devo's are calling next to me so i pick one up and it says this "A mind that is unfocused is vulnerable to the world, the flesh, and the devil, all of which exert a downward pull on your thoughts. Lack of direction, me yes me!

those words "Vulnerable and unfocused" tho.

The writer suggest the best remedy is to refocus your mind and heart on Me, your constant Companion. He will never let you down. He never gets things wrong. He isn't so much concerned about what you're getting right. He is concerned about your focus, so He can help you get focused. The getting better at doing right comes later.

In the back ground as i write i hear Him calling. Calling me to Him. Am i listening to my thoughts or to Him. Man if i could glance at His eyes, just one look at His face. Only to see His face. With His beautiful presence He can take me into His sacred holy place. i reflect on what the saints are doing in heaven. It says they are bowing down in a great concert with everyone singing praises to the Father. HOLY! HOLY! HOLY! They cry out. My deceased Jesus loving friends are worshiping the King. i join "On earth as it is in heaven". A glimpse. HOLY! HOLY! HOLY! LORD GOD ALMIGHTY! Crying out...with tears. it feels good to join with all of heaven and cry out.

Tears fall and i realize my focus is off. i need more of Him to settle my wrestling heart. my angst! The Psalmist writes  "By your words I can see where I'm going; they throw a beam of light on my dark path. I've committed myself and I'll never turn back from living by your righteous order. Everythings's falling apart on me, God put me together again with your Word."

My daughter use to write a song on heart over and over the refrain was "Put together your heart." She knew God will put together all our broken pieces of our heart. He is the heart surgeon. He makes things new and right.

i guess i've laughed, cried and it's only 12n. What's next? i have to say peace remains in my heart. peace that my savior is there. i really don't know which way things will go but i have my peace. the one thing i asked of my Jesus on Oct. 2, 1992. i just want peace. not having all the answers i by faith got a sense of God's wholeness, and i knew everything was coming together for good. he was putting my heart back together. that's my story. a heart repair. without his presence i feel empty. he is my peace. the thing i crave.

i guess i've now laughed, cried and been vulnerable. i'm wrapping up with those words "being vulnerable". i'm gonna ask God who i can be vulnerable with. but i know for sure that i can be vulnerable with Him. he already knows anyway. but being vulnerable with Him allows me to release those emotions contained deep within me that are rotting inside of me.

oh, and about the guy who RANTS, come on he's kind of funny. i'm glad i got to laugh. (Graham Allen)

by the way i like to type and not be perfect at times. the reason for the lack of structure in this article. i hope you bear with me. but it is kind of freeing to just write. write where the spirit leads me with out being perfect.

i have trusted what the psalmist knew to be true about God. if you want to put together your heart the psalmist says "Put together with His word."
so if you want to track those words down here is where it is from
Psalm 119
Philippians 4 (sense of God's wholeness)
i quoted from the Message bible.

WRAP UP:
i just reread this message. which again you need to know when i sat down i didn't have a clue what it was gonna be about.
the words i guess God wants me to focus on today that you may consider also. (see he's trying to help me, us?)
focus, be vulnerable, put together my heart, rant

i can always rant to God and he still loves me. big shout out to God!