Tuesday, October 28, 2014

I GET TO



Hi all! My friend sent me this story her friend wrote. Enjoy this story as it has so much rich insight!

I wanted to take a moment to reach out to each of you. The last few weeks have been so tiring and overwhelming for me as I am sure you would all agree to the same! I started not to feel like myself and became quite frustrated with the daily mind game that I had to play with myself to get through all of the responsibilities with grace and patience. This includes simple things that I used to find such joy in (waking up my children, making dinner for my family, etc.). I felt like I would go to bed exhausted, wake up the next morning with high hopes and a better day and very quickly it always seemed to take a turn for the worse. I reached out to my sister on Monday morning when my day was in shambles before I even set foot on Lincoln property. My text read: I can not do this any more. Something has to change. How will I ever face all that I have to do today??? I can't get it all done. My wise sister (who has also been struggling with this issue in her life) responded with such wisdom that I would like to share it with you all.  

She said:" Change your perspective. Listen: Do not say have to, say I get to. It hit me like a ton of bricks this morning. Relieve your burden. Change obligation to opportunity. Look: "I get to wake up Maddie. I get to go to work. I get to teach my class. I get to go to Orlando today to participate in homeschool group. I get to take my son to band. I get to make dinner. It changes burdened to BLESSED." 

I instantly felt relief as I looked at my drive to Luca's school as a gift. I get to drop my son off and give him a hug each morning as he starts off his day. I get to drive with my daughter to school in the morning providing me with time to chat. Something that I will not always have the opportunity to do (after all, some day she will be off to college). When I walked into Lincoln Monday morning I was flooded with new realities. I get to be a part of my students' journey through life. I get to report to parents on strengths and weaknesses. I get to work in a building with amazing people. I get to be the person who reaches out to a child who is feeling distraught or frustrated. It continued throughout the day and instead of feeling heavy with burdens, each moment became an opportunity. I did not feel the rush, the anxiety, the frustration. 

I woke the next day hoping for another day like Monday. I will tell you I was afraid I would go back to where I was at before. Instead, I found renewed hope and calm as I continued to live in opportunity instead of obligation. I was humbled by my daughter (not really a big surprise here due to my inability to parent well) and I started sharing this with her. I reassured her that she doesn't need to be so frustrated (she didn't want to have to go get Luca and Grandma Kelly sometimes frustrates her). I reframed it for her: "You get to be a big sister to Luca and be the one who reads to him." The tears started to flow. I realized on that day that living in opportunity is also living in gratitude. What a gift to be a big sister! We continued...."You get to spend time with her Grandma Kelly (who loves you so much!). Many other people have lost a grandparent and can never have that time or have never met their grandparents. As she reflected she said: "So, I don't have to go to school, I get to go to a great school and learn. Not everyone has a nice school like Lincoln." Yes Delaney, you get it!   
Me: "I get to go to the grocery store because I have legs to walk to the car, a car to drive, and money to spend at the store to feed my family." 

I was tearful because I recognized that I have been taking so much for granted and missing out on so much during my crazed days. I want for my children to learn to live in opportunity not obligation and I realized that I had not been showing that to them. I am truly humbled by this new perspective. 
So does this mean that every day will be perfect and I will never feel frustrated again? Absolutely not. After a lot of redirection last night, I began to get frustrated with my kid's lack of following directions the first time. Ugh! Parenting can be so tiring....but....I get to be a mother to two children. I get to help them learn through consequences and love. I get to help shape them into responsible people. And then I was able to take the opportunity to do so, in a constructive way. Changing my perspective gave me opportunity instead of an exhausting obligation. Burdened became blessed.  

God is our refuge and strength,
    an ever-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1
God wants to help you in your trouble. Start your day with a prayer.
Dear God: I get to love you. I get to know that you are with me. I get to be your child. Thank you for each new day. I get to ask you for help today.  Help me. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.

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